Slightly Obsessed #043: Are You Starving?

Blessed are those who hunger….

–Matthew 5:6

 

His eyes are icy blue pools in a sea of brown mink.

His long teeth protrude slightly from under his upper lip, reminiscent of some distant saber-toothed relative. He purrs softly as he rubs his nose against my hand in a blatant bid to be petted.

I run my hand along his back and wince. His backbone is a jarring reminder of his recent health struggles. I can’t get our aging Siamese cat to eat and it’s driving me crazy. We’re hoping more tests at the veterinary clinic will diagnose the problem.

We love him so much. He’s been such a wonderful companion that it kills me to see him grow this gaunt. He looks like he’s survived his own personal holocaust, and I don’t know why.

Do I look like that to God?

Does it hurt Him to see me lurch along the dry valleys without cracking open the Bible, trying to live on yesterday’s meal? I sense the gnawing inside me, but I’m too distracted by what’s happening in my world to recognize the hunger.

God is urgently calling.

Sin commands the airwaves of my existence in this society. Wickedness flaunts her gaudy dress everywhere my eyes rest, until I look away in embarrassment. Then it gets easier to not bother looking away. I am conquered by the shock and awe of the bombardment, felled not so much by the sins of commission as by one sin of omission.

I haven’t been to the Table. 

God is urgently calling.

The Spirit gives me a glimpse of my condition. I’m stunned at the sight. There is little flesh beneath my sagging faith. Then I feel the weariness the battle against my soul has produced. I recognize the raging hunger and thirst.

God is urgently calling.

I’m tired of compromise, fed up with just surviving, and finally listening. The craving is pure in the yearning; holy in the seeking; powerful in the fulfillment. God’s Word corrects my path, cleanses my heart, inspires me onward. He speaks to me gently, like the good Father He is. God never berates me for waiting so long. He simply fills me—rejoicing in my prayer, dancing over my tears of repentance, calling me to lift my empty hands to Him. He is always there, and His provision is abundant.

Why do I wait so long? Are you starving, too?

 

Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness,
    for they will be filled.

-Matthew 5:6 NIV

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